I'M PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm PISSED because I cannot study, I cannot study to save my own life

I'm pissed because I'm bored

I'm pissed because there's so much I want to do, but I can't, because I just can't

I'm pissed because I'm lazy, so lazy, if I can't find the remote, I won't turn the TV on

I'm pissed because I cannot do what I love to do the most, because I'm too far away, and the only way I can do it right now is by paying for it (Oh you bastards, get your minds out of the goddamn gutter)

I'm pissed because I'm lonely. I make a lot of friends but in the process, I tend to fall out of touch with old ones, and when I move, I've got neither, like right now :-(

I'm pissed because my good friends don't cut me any slack for not staying in touch. You know I don't do it on purpose you pricks! Hell, why can't you people drop ME a line once in a while??

I'm pissed because people get pissed when I don't call them back. Well, my father goes paranoid when the phone bill goes past a thousand (And I'm talking rupees here). Don't you fools remember how often I used to call all of you when I was earning my own dough??

I'm pissed that my father doesn't let me go out after 10 in the night either. I'm not a fu*king girl for god's sake! Men won't rape me (if women want to, be my guest! Hehe). If somebody steals my wallet, what they'll get is my lucky one rupee coin and a bunch of supermarket membership cards with magnetic stripes that kinda look like credit cards (The robber might kill me for that though, I don't deny that is a concern)

I'm pissed because I am a selfish, judgmental, vulgar, slow son-of-a-bitch (In case some of my friends didn't know this, or were unable to decode any of my subtle indications, now you do) and I seem to like it

I'm pissed because the world is just wrong

I'm pissed because people in New Delhi cannot look around and say, "Fu*k, this place is fu*king bullshit!" (Oh you naive, patriotic-for-nothing dumb-fu*ks)

I'm pissed because our leaders so confidently say, "Oh no, we are not the ones polluting, you developed countries are!"

[I actually did some research. All I needed to do was look at visibility figures for major airports in India and those of some of the most (Or so called) polluted cities in the world. Even the most (Or so called) Un-polluted cities in India are covered with haze almost throughout the year, unlike the more (Or so called) polluted cities where it happens maybe once a month or once a year even! In my Trademark lingo, I'm going to say, Un-fu*king-believable!]

I'm pissed our leaders are all just generally screwed up

I'm pissed that some guy flaunts the fact that India is a 1.1 billion strong, 1.5 trillion dollar economy. Stop f*cking embarrassing us DUDE! (That's not even $1500 per head for even a microsecond!)

(I know that a lot of absolutely shoe-dumb-fu*king-IDIOTS are going to see NOTHING else on this blog and will go on to comment on just this point, wait and watch, wait.... and watch) :-D

I'm pissed (and I'm really pissed about this) because on facebook, I found a community of dumb-nut-sh*ts who think Delhi has a chance at hosting the 2020 Olympics (This is where I found the aforementioned fact BTW). Yeah f*cking right, look around! This city is going to the fu*king dogs. Do your part by not littering or not trying to run people over or not fighting with each other. You cannot drive in your own fu*king lane, how the f*ck are you going to organize yourself for, leave alone hosting, even convincing the world Delhi's good enough for the Olympics?? Shame on you!!

I'm pissed because there is so much corruption and hooliganism in this country, I'm sure someone will offer me a bribe or have me whacked so this blog doesn't reach the outside world

I'm pissed that the week starts with a Monday and ends with a Sunday. How sad.

I'm pissed because girls are so f*cking complicated. Hehehe

I'm pissed because I always seem to fall for the wrong ones.

I'm pissed I look at outer-beauty first :-D (Oh, so it's wrong if an unattractive guy does it, isn't it?? You unreasonable pricks)

I'm pissed because when I ask them out, the line I most often get is, "You're a great guy, you deserve somebody better". Oh fu*king yeah? This just bowls me over. Shouldn't that, like, make me irresistible or something? Shouldn't you all feel flattered I asked you out then? F*ck YOU!

I'm pissed because everything just always seems to have wrong timing, like right now, I'm writing and I REALLY need to take a piss. Excuse me....... :-D

(Okay, I'm back)

I'm pissed because I consider flight simulator flying very close to real flying (Whatever fools, I know I can still kick some solid veteran captain ass on the real thing, bring it on!)

I'm pissed because there are a lot of numbskulls at the reins (Or atleast the right seats) of SpiceJet 737s. I'm supposed to be flying those beauties!! Why?? No reason, I'm being unreasonable and cocky on MY blog, sue me!

I'm pissed that people think I need to grow up. Why? So you can say, "Oh dude, that is just fuc*ed up!" if I did something that I should have been able to get away with??

I'm pissed people take me too seriously!

I'm pissed after reading this blog you're all still taking me too seriously!

I'm SUPER-pissed because I can't think of any more stuff I am pissed about, and I KNOW there's a lot more stuff

Thanks for reading

I'm happy I'm going to sleep now :-)

NEW DELHI TRAFF*CK

Ah, its so great to be back to Delhi. I was getting spoiled by Canadian driving habits. Good to be back to getting 'soiled' by New Delhi's driving habits.

Honking!!!!!! Oh, this really cracked me up. As soon as I exited the airport, what I heard was the blare of a horn (The first one I had heard in 6 months or more). I knew I was in Delhi. I smiled to myself. Pretty soon though, honking was all I heard (And I landed at 3 AM). Goddamn!!! Why so much honking in the city? I guess some do it to warn people they are being overtaken, some do it to protest being overtaken, some do it because they didn't like how somebody overtook them, some do it to break monotony (Of 2 seconds of horn-silence), some do it because they see a pedestrian about to cross the road and they don't want him/her to, and lets not forget the HRs & UPs who do it to 'show off' (?????) (Oh, I can't find a category to put this under, so here's an honorable mention. Some HR & UP bikers fold their rear-view mirrors inwards to form a sort of protective sun-shield for the instrument cluster (I'd REALLY like to believe that is the reason they're doing it and NOT to make a style statement). Some remove their rear-view mirrors altogether to reduce aerodynamic drag (Again, I'm trying to think optimistically). They then get hit and run over by a bus from behind cuz they had NO WAY to determine whether there was a vehicle behind them, get their illiterate brains crushed and spilled all over the road

Courtesy: Drivers in Delhi are NOT courteous. Find an inch of space, even a guy who is in no hurry whatsoever will try and fit his small one in. Hehe. At an intersection without a traffic light, say driver 'B' sees driver 'A' coming and driver 'A' should go through before 'B' gets there if everything goes well, I swear, it seems as if 'B' speeds up just to get there in time to stop 'A' and block traffic for everyone else! Un-f*cking-believeable! I might've pushed it a little bit with exaggerating, but trust me, traffic is THAT ridiculous

Right of Way: This is the order in which items on the road have right of way, in decreasing order of importance:

- Buses and trucks

- Expensive & VIP cars

- Cars with HR & UP plates

- Call-centre cabs

- Cars with chauffeurs

- Cars without chauffers

- Motorcycles

- Cycles

- Dogs

- Human beings

I don't need to say more. (Anybody with an argument to this is most welcome to kiss my a**)

Cars on the right have little or no right of way. Overtaking is best done from the left (And we in India drive on the left). The high speed lane is everywhere (Unfortunately, so is the low speed lane).

Human Beings: India's super intelligent pedestrians. They think they have right of way. Actually, I'm pretty sure they're certain they have right of way. They don't. Cars and other motorized vehicles do. This is one thing I'm not protesting. If pedestrians choose to cross a busy road wherever they wished to, maybe its a good idea vehicles didn't stop for them. We've got enough red lights. We (Motorists) don't come to a screeching halt every 200 meters for no reason! Can't these jaywalkers cross over at signals???

Helmets and Seatbelts: You must all know there are rules regarding wearing seat belts and helmets in the capital city. You gotta wear em! I'm really glad 100% of the motoring public does adhere to these rules. The animals operating bikes and cars and buses don't though. Whatever. Who cares? They're animals! Why should I give a shit if an ass or a monkey gets his brains spilled across the road?? And frankly, even if I did want to, I could not do much to increase their (HR & UP, and I'm not talking about just the plates here) IQ levels. It's funny that they think riding around fast without helmets makes them look cool! Girls'll dig 'em. Bullshit. What girl in her right mind would get impressed by an ass or monkey riding a bike (Part 1) recklessly around town (Part 2) without a protective hat (Part 3)? Oh, just a little mention regarding seat belts and helmets, a fact actually. Hold an interview with Delhi motorists, if 99% of them say they do these things to escape from getting a ticket and not because they give a shit about personal safety, I'm superman

Markings on the street: I was shocked when I saw markings on Delhi roads after coming back this time. I never really noticed em before! I feel like an ass myself now. There are marks separating lanes, marks indicating lane usage (Left turning traffic, right turning traffic). WOW! Oh NOW I KNOW! I never noticed em because of all the traffic on top of them. 3 lanes on a typical Delhi road on a typical Delhi day are occupied by atleast 6 lanes of traffic. Funniest part is, 75% of these 6 lanes don't exactly know where they're supposed to be. The guy who wants to turn right is on the extreme left and so on. If you got within 5 feet of another vehicle in a more civilized country, people would start freaking out! Here, it's an everyday affair. Maybe that is why when they have a traffic slowdown, things still manage to move at atleast 20-40 kmph. Maybe that is why people there don't ever end up in a traffic jam for 2 hrs stuck between half a km stretch of road.

Delhi Cops: With you, for you, always (For a small to medium to large compensation, and NOT from the government): Cops in Delhi are simply fantastic. They eat well, they make good money (under the table), they..... are fantastically USELESS! Traffic cops: A whole entire Police division dedicated to controlling vehicular traffic, something a lot of countries haven't employed. It should work pretty well, but it doesn't. I got stuck in a traffic jam recently when it rained in Delhi. Most of the traffic lights were taken out (I'm no scientist, but there must be a very simple solution to this). I managed to cover exactly 500 meters in 2 hours. Seriously, where the F*** were these dumbf**k cops?? If they'd gotten there a little earlier, traffic wouldn't have been racing with each other to get past an intersection and in the process, creating a glorious traffic jam. Cops get to such a situation just in time to look at the situation and say, "F***, I can't do anything with this, we'll just have to let it work out for itself!" Once the traffic does start moving, you can see them waving their arms and feet around as if they had anything to do with it, sometimes even making gestures that suggest we are responsible for not having had the traffic under control.

Animals, auto-rickshaws and cycle-rickshaws: If a lot of livelihoods didn't depend on it, I would sell my entire property to advocate having them thrown out. Indian heritage or not, they slow traffic down, they are a pain in the ass, they don't know any of the rules, they swerve as if they are driving Ferraris and will never get rear ended. Delhi is not the place for these vehicles. I'm sorry.

Why did I write this?? No reason. I was bored. Does that mean any of this is far from the truth? Maybe, maybe not. You decide!

Flight Sim Adventures

I flew a 737 at 330 knots 20 feet above the ground today!!! Thanks to all the time spent flying (And crashing) the F18, slower jets seem, well, just slow. Flying the aerobatic Extra 300 now (Which used to be one of my faves earlier) seems as if I'm flying it with a 2 tonne concrete block attached to the tail. Kinda makes you wonder how it manages to do loops etc with such a puny engine and hardly any momentum. But then again, the thing weighs a couple of hundred pounds while the F18 is a 23,000 lbs monster! I love flying so much!! Not only is it challenging AND a lot of fun at the same time, it gives your mind a workout once in a while.